28 Days of Truth, Art and Healing: Day #4 Starting Anew with My Body [entry-title permalink="0"]

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I’ve been working on my Discovery Art page for my Painting to Heal course, for the last few days..the question I was entering into the page with was, “how can I start anew with my body?”. This is the question that emerged from writing my her-story (history) with my body starting from childhood till now.

I realized through writing about my relationship with my body from childhood till now, I have been operating from that very history, living my life through that history and seeing my body through that lens. Being a trauma survivor has caused me to get really comfortable living from the neck up, living in my head has been much safer for me..but I am clear that I am missing so much by not being “in my body”.

In order to start anew with my body, I have to treat it as if I am starting anew in a relationship with someone that I’ve already been in relationship with. In my healing journal, I asked myself how would I start anew with this person and this is what came up for me:

I would need to see them/my body with new eyes

Letting go of judgment and preconceived notions of the person/my body

Letting go of what I think this person/my body is, can and cannot do

Learning to trust this person/my body

Allowing myself to be in a deeper, more meaningful and authentic relationship with this person/my body.

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Although I can never fully release the past, I can improve and begin to see my body with new eyes, with eyes of love, of gratitude, of reverence…I can begin to see how my body is connected to creativity, to my spiritual life, to food, to pleasure, to the fullness of my life. That is the kind of relationship I long for with my body. I want to feel what it is like to be more fully embodied and what wisdom will be revealed and what healing that will bring.

I can feel the mix of fear and excitement in this intention and I know I will need to surrender to the process again and again, letting go of layers of resistance and fear each time, letting myself fall into the arms of trust.

I am willing.