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New Year’s Eve was often a holiday I dreaded because I often would look at what I had not accomplished and feel guilt and shame about all the things I said I was going to do and did not do.  It was a horrible feeling.

Some practices have helped change that. One is to make an “I Did it List” an idea introduced by Tara Gentile over at Scoutie Girl.

So here is this year’s I DID IT LIST (be sure to leave a comment and share yours, would love to celebrate with you. Also if you do a blog post, include the link)

 

I opened up an online sanctuary for women healing from childhood wounding. This was a strong desire for a couple of years before I finally built up enough courage to do it! We are now at almost 200 women, at the Healing Truth Sanctuary.

I created four courses this year and a one year healing program and facilitated close to 80 women working on some deeply personal and difficult challenges.

I did all of the above while dealing with chronic pain, 2 hospital stays and one surgery due to long term health issues.

I reduced my triglycerides to almost normal in just one month with a big change in diet and medication.

I made over 200 art/coaching videos (for my courses and some are free on youtube)

I continued to release relationships that were not life giving to me. I think it is important to realize when you’ve made up a story about someone because of your own insecurities and when you are letting someone go because they are truly not good for you, toxic, and you have evidence of that.

I made some solid female friendships. Women who I love dearly and who I feel loved by.

When I couldn’t walk for almost two months and was literally bedridden, I surrendered, I accepted help and I opened myself up to the incredible friends that came and supported me.

I survived my surgery with flying colors and walked and have been walking ever since.

I completed a ten month Core Energetics program even while not being able to walk for the last session. I literally laid on the floor with pillows and I SHOWED UP.

I blogged, not as much as I wanted to, but I blogged and shared my heart.

I did my “work” as Iyanla Vanzant says. I worked on myself while still helping others. It’s hard to balance this, but I did it. I pushed through my own resistance, I became more self aware, I opened up, I told the truth, I allowed myself to be vulnerable.

I shared my gifts. I had the courage to claim that what I have to say as valuable, what I have to offer as worthy, my art as worthy of being called art. I claimed the title of writer and owned that my writing rocks at times. I owned that I know enough about childhood trauma and healing to help other women work through it as well. It takes a lot guts (not arrogance) to own all of this and I own it with humility and a great understanding that I have much to learn as well in all of these areas.

I painted. I painted in my art journal, on big pieces of paper, on canvases, in sketch books, in altered books and I took the risk to share my heart through my art and to heal through art. I took the risk, to make an artist page, to create a Facebook group for mixed media portraits, to create a Facebook page for Healing Truth Art.

This year’s word was Grounded and boy did I get grounded on this earth by claiming space for myself, something I struggled with so greatly after feeling like I didn’t belong or didn’t deserve anything in this life for so many years.

Next year’s word of the year is Change. My intention is to focus on the areas that still need change. I hope to continue the work I’m doing and facilitate even more women this year, who are wanting to continue going DEEP. I hope to continue to practice self care and create some more manageable rituals around it. To focus on my writing more this year but continue to create art as well. These are just some of the intentions I have for this coming year.

Most of all I want to continue to love and be loved and continue on my own healing path.